Sisters

My Reflection in You:

I could never love anyone as I love my sisters. Jo March, Little Women—Louisa May Alcott

There is no one as similar and dissimilar to me all at once as my sister. Our connection is real. Our love for each other is constant.

We are as close as two people can be, yet we can clash! We are complicated that way; our disagreements are intense. Conversely, we share a silly sense of humor that we can unleash in a moment’s notice. It’s our sister superpower, and it’s there whenever we need it to get us through.

Since my surgery when we both experienced a seismic shift in our lives, each of us has made her own adjustments. Susan has made an unfathomable amount of space for me in her life. She accompanies me to my dialysis appointments. Before I was certified to drive again, she came to all my other medical appointments, too. She shops, cooks, and does the heavy lifting in our daily lives.

There’s no end to what she has taken on while simultaneously dedicating herself to her professional work as an artist and educator. I sometimes wonder where she gets her energy!

We joke that even before my surgery I barely had half the energy she has when she’s tired. That hasn’t changed. I operate on a low battery. Susan is the Energizer Bunny…

What sustains us? After all, we are so different! She likes chaos, I like order, she is an extrovert, I am an introvert…

Yet we share our traditions and values. For each of us, family is at the heart of everything. We carry a rich family connection and history into our present lives.

Our home is filled with treasured artwork. We are blessed with gifted friends, many of whom are talented artists. We have Susan’s own sculptures, plus prints, paintings, luminaries, and sculptures from our friends and artists across the U.S. We have created an ancestral wall with a montage of dear family members whom we loved and lost.

We share our creative connection. Sue is an artist; I am a graphic designer and self-taught artist. Our mom used to joke that any time we were cranky when we were little, she would plop us in front of the tv with crayons in our hands. Without even intending to, she baked creativity into our very DNA.

While Susan has made space for me, I have made space for her, too. For more than five decades I made it a point to live on my own; travel independently wherever and whenever I chose. In fact, I spent most of my adult life trying to prove to myself that I could be independent. Then, in an instant, that was irrelevant.

Rumi writes: Life is a balance of holding on and letting go.

So now I am learning when to hold on and when to let go. I am learning how to be part of a twosome. I am incredibly lucky that I can rely on Susan’s steadfast commitment.

Without her I would not have been able to return home. I would most likely have ended up in a facility somewhere. After all those years spent proving my self-reliance, now I am tasked with letting go and relaxing into our life as a dynamic duo.

I am thankful for past adventures, spiritual retreats, and countless other quests I undertook. These days I search for micro adventures—jaunts to unexplored territories nearby; zoom events that I can take part in right here in my own home.

Last summer Sue and I took a short trek to The Orchard House, where Louisa May Alcott wrote Little Women. It was a glorious day for us both. We enjoyed seeing the place and hearing the history. Even though it is in Concord, not very far from where we live, I felt we had found a precious jewel.

Sometimes I still yearn for autonomy. It’s ironic that I worked so hard for an independent life only to have to let it go. Now I try to fill the unfamiliar spaces with gratitude, making that the underpinning of my days.

There is nobody I relate to like my sister. She reflects me back to myself. She reflects my own history and my own truth.

This month’s recipe:

Susan’s Spicy Green Beans

These Green Beans are a great side dish and can round out any meal. We have paired them with Sweet and Sour Eggplant and other dishes. Recently we even made the sauce with Cauliflower and it was great. Feel free to try it using other vegetables, too.

Note: We cook for two so adapt as needed.

Ingredients:

Green Beans – 2 servings, cleaned and ready to cook

2 Tbsp of sesame oil

4 cloves of garlic, minced

½ cup of no sodium chicken soup – or any soup of your choosing

chili powder 4-5 shakes depending on how hot you want the beans

1 full tsp of Sun Luck Hoisin Sauce

Directions:

1. Use a medium size skillet

2. Add in the Sesame Oil and Garlic and heat the skillet

3. Add green beans and mix for a few minutes

4. Cover the beans with the soup, add the Hoisin Sauce and the Chili Powder and mix the ingredients through.

5. Cook over a high heat to steam the beans and reduce the liquid

6. Cover if needed.

7. The beans cook pretty quickly and are delicious

This takes about 15 minutes to cook. It is quick and easy.

Find more recipes here.